My Child Struggles to Fall Asleep: How to Help Them Sleep Better and Learn More Easily

Why Sleep Matters More Than You Think

Your child is tired. You're tired. And yet, when bedtime comes around, sleep doesn’t always follow. You’ve dimmed the lights, read the stories, avoided sugar—and still, your child lies in bed, wide-eyed, restless, and anxious about the next day of school. It’s not only frustrating—it’s also deeply worrying, especially when you begin to notice learning difficulties or trouble focusing in class.

The connection between sleep and learning is not just anecdotal—it’s backed by growing research. Children between the ages of 6 and 12 are in a critical stage of cognitive development. During those deep nighttime hours, the brain consolidates memories, processes information, and strengthens neural pathways essential for things like reading, math, and emotional regulation.

We explore this in more detail in our article Sleep, Brain Development and Learning: Why Your Child’s Rest Matters More Than You Think.

When Bedtime Becomes a Battleground

For many families, nighttime resistance is a regular feature of the evening routine. Some kids are simply not sleepy at bedtime. Others seem emotionally wound-up or anxious about school, homework, or friendships. These emotions—often amplified just as the house begins to quiet down—can interfere hugely with the body’s ability to wind down for sleep.

The consequence? Struggles with memory, difficulty concentrating, lower mood, and an inability to retain what they’re learning in school. As explained in our post Why Your Child Learns Better After a Good Night’s Sleep, restful sleep is not a luxury but a cornerstone of your child’s academic and emotional well-being.

Reimagining the Evening Routine

Helping your child fall asleep more easily begins with examining what the hours before bedtime actually look like. Is there a winding-down period? Are screens turned off, or is your child flipping between videos right up until lights off?

One powerful shift many parents find helpful is creating a predictable, screen-free, and emotionally soothing pre-bedtime window—ideally 30 to 60 minutes before sleep. This could include:

• Switching from screens to quiet reading or listening
• Engaging in light drawing, puzzles, or journaling
• Brushing teeth and getting into pajamas as part of a soft ritual
• Dim lighting, warm blankets, and soft background sounds

If reading feels like a battle or your child has literacy challenges, this is where audio storytelling can be transformational. A thoughtful option is the LISN Kids App, which offers high-quality original audiobooks and audio series created specifically for children aged 3–12. Families can access the app from both iOS and Android. Settling in with a calming audio story can become a treasured part of your child’s bedtime ritual.

Understanding Your Child’s Sleep Biology

Sometimes, the issue isn’t behavioral at all—it’s biological. Around the age of 6 to 12, sleep rhythms begin to shift more gradually. Your child may naturally be more of a night owl than you’d expect. Instead of fighting this entirely, try slowly pushing bedtime slightly later and awakening times slightly earlier to create a new rhythm that still allows for 9–11 hours of sleep per night—recommended for school-aged children.

Be patient. Resetting a child’s internal clock doesn’t happen overnight. It often requires consistent cues: dim lights in the evening, sunlight in the morning, and gentle encouragement to wind down instead of speeding up during the last hour of the day.

Our article Best Bedtime Tools to Help Kids Sleep Better offers additional guidance on establishing rhythms that support both rest and learning.

Removing Hidden Sleep Disruptors

Sometimes, sleep issues are rooted in small but powerful environmental or behavioral disruptors. Consider asking yourself:

• Is the bedroom too bright? Even small lights from chargers or hallway light can disrupt melatonin production.
• Is your child getting enough physical activity during the day?
• Do they feel emotionally safe and secure at night?
• Is anxiety—perhaps around school, tests, or friendships—surfacing at bedtime?

These questions can be difficult to answer in the bustle of day-to-day life, but your honest observations can lead to essential changes. You might talk more openly with your child during the day so worries don’t pile up at night. Or, you might transition away from overstimulating games in the evening in favor of calmer exchanges. When needed, seek support from a pediatrician or child psychologist—especially if your child shows signs of serious anxiety or persistent sleep issues.

What About Screen Time?

In the hour before bedtime, screens can severely disrupt your child’s ability to wind down. Blue light emitted from tablets and phones interferes with the natural secretion of melatonin, a key sleep hormone. Even more, the content itself—fast-paced videos, games, and digital interactions—stimulates the brain in ways that make quiet focus, reading, or even simple rest nearly impossible.

We explain the science behind this in our article Evening Reading or Screen Time: Which Is Better for Your Child’s Sleep? and make a strong case for replacing screens with more gentle, slower forms of evening engagement—like stories kids can listen to without staring at a screen.

Compassion Over Perfection

Above all, remember this: the goal isn’t to create a perfect sleep routine overnight. It’s to nurture a safe, calming rhythm that evolves with your child—and with you. Some nights will still be hard. Some mornings will still begin with yawns. But over time, small consistent changes can create big improvements—not just in how quickly your child falls asleep, but in how deeply they learn and how confidently they show up in their day-to-day world.

Sleep is not a reward—it’s a need. By treating it with care, compassion, and routine, you’re offering your child one of the most powerful supports for learning they’ll ever receive.