Let the Tears Flow: Why Crying Can Be Healthy for Your Child

Why Is Your Child Crying So Much?

You've had a long day. Your child comes home from school, drops their backpack, and bursts into tears. Maybe it's because a friend said something hurtful, or the math homework just feels impossible today. You try to hug them, reason with them, distract them—but nothing seems to work. The tears keep coming.

It’s tempting to shut it down. "You’re okay," we say. "There’s no need to cry." But what if those tears aren’t just an overreaction? What if they’re a necessary release—a natural way for children to process stress, disappointment, and frustration?

Crying as an Emotional Release

Crying isn’t always a problem to solve. For children between the ages of 6 and 12, it's often a sign that their emotional cup is full. Unlike adults, kids this age haven’t yet developed all the tools for emotional regulation. That after-school meltdown? It might be their version of catharsis.

This is especially true if your child is navigating learning difficulties, school-related stress, or social challenges. Crying can help them make sense of overwhelming experiences. In fact, after-school meltdowns are more than common—they’re a signal that your child feels safe enough at home to let down their guard.

When We Silence Tears, We Risk Silencing Emotions

As parents, it’s natural to want to protect our children from distress. But well-meaning phrases like "Don’t cry," "You’re being dramatic," or "You’re too old for this" can actually send the message that emotions are dangerous or shameful. Over time, your child may start suppressing what they feel—which doesn’t make those emotions disappear. Instead, they bubble up in other forms: irritability, anxiety, sleep trouble, or even withdrawal.

Instead of stopping the tears, try simply being present. Sit beside them. Offer a tissue. Say, “I see you’re feeling a lot right now. I’m here with you.” You don’t have to fix the problem right away—in fact, often the most powerful gift is your calm, quiet presence.

Tears and Learning: It’s All Connected

Children who struggle with homework or learning challenges often carry invisible stress. The school day may feel like a mountain they climb every morning, only to slide back down by afternoon. Crying can be a release valve—especially for kids who are perfectionists or who hold it together all day at school only to fall apart at home.

In these moments, your child may not even know why they’re crying. Emotional vocabulary is still developing in this age group. That’s why it’s helpful to introduce the idea of emotions as waves: they rise, they crest, and they fall. Letting a child feel is often the first step to helping them learn emotional awareness.

How You Can Support Crying in a Healthy Way

Let your home be a safe space where emotions—including tears—are welcome. Here are a few gentle approaches to consider, without turning this into a step-by-step formula:

• Respond with empathy rather than urgency. Instead of saying “Don't cry,” try “It’s okay to be upset. I’m listening.”
• Stay physically close, but don’t rush to fix the issue. Your calm presence matters more than perfect words.
• Give them time. Sometimes after crying, children are more ready to talk or problem-solve.
• Model your own emotional openness. It's okay to say, “I felt like crying today, too.”

If the tears happen frequently or seem to be interfering with daily life, don’t hesitate to explore what might lie beneath. Our guide on when to seek professional help can point you in the right direction.

Tools That Nurture Emotional Expression

Not all children communicate with words. Some make sense of the world more easily through stories, characters, and play. That’s why creative tools can be so helpful. The LISN Kids App, for instance, offers a library of original audiobooks and audio series made especially for kids aged 3 to 12. Whether you use it for quiet wind-down time after a tough day or a shared storytelling moment at bedtime, it's a screen-free way to connect emotionally with your child and open up conversations.

The app is available on iOS and Android.

Letting Go Doesn’t Mean Giving Up

Letting your child cry doesn’t mean you’re giving in or losing control. It means you’re showing them that difficult emotions are part of life—and that they are not alone in them.

As your child grows, they'll begin to develop stronger coping skills. You can help guide them with tools like calm-down strategies, reflection, and connection. For inspiration, this article on teaching your child to calm down without yelling may be helpful as a next step.

Your presence, your patience, and yes—your acceptance of even the loudest tears—can help your child feel safe in a world that often tells them to toughen up. In doing so, you nurture resilience from the inside out.