How to Support a Child Who’s Jealous of Friends’ Video Games

Understanding Where the Jealousy Comes From

It's one of those conversations that might begin at the dinner table or on the way home from school — your child mentions what their friends are playing. Maybe it's the newest game their classmate got for their birthday, or a multiplayer app they hear everyone talking about at recess. Soon enough, the tone shifts: frustration, sadness, maybe even anger. Your child doesn’t just want to play too — they feel left out, less than, or even neglected.

Jealousy in children aged 6 to 12 is rarely about the video games themselves. More often, it’s about feeling excluded or inferior compared to peers. Kids at this age are becoming acutely aware of social hierarchies and peer dynamics. When a friend has something they don’t — especially something as socially charged as a popular game — emotions run high.

It’s Not Just About Screen Time

While many parents today are rightly concerned about excessive screen usage, jealousy over games isn’t solved just by more access. In fact, adding screen time without conversation can create more distance between you and your child. For many kids, the games their friends play represent belonging, connection, and identity. Your child isn’t just asking for a console — they want to be part of a shared language and experience.

So what’s a loving, emotionally exhausted parent supposed to do? The first step is validation. Let your child share their feelings. Avoid rushing in with problem-solving or dismissing their emotions. “I get why you feel left out when other kids are playing something you’re not. That can feel unfair.” That acknowledgment alone is often more comforting than you realize.

Looking Beneath the Surface

Sometimes, a child’s jealousy is more than surface-level envy — it might hide fears of being left out socially or struggling with comparison. Check in with questions like:

• “What do you like about that game your friend plays?”
• “Do you feel like kids talk about it all the time at school?”
• “Would you be more excited about the game or about playing with friends?”

By opening this dialogue, you’re inviting your child to reflect on what they truly seek: entertainment, connection, admiration? This can help you both find healthy alternatives that still meet those needs without compromising your values around screen time or age-appropriate content.

Finding Balance Without Saying "No" All the Time

If you’ve made the decision not to allow a certain game or gaming device in your home, your stance doesn’t have to be a hard wall. Stay open to creative alternatives. For instance:

• Encourage your child to invite friends over for non-digital playdates — games, crafts, or building challenges.
• Share non-violent, age-appropriate games that align with your family’s values, and even participate with them when possible.
• Together, explore stories and activities that build imagination and curiosity outside a screen.

Audio storytelling, for example, can be a powerful tool to redirect attention from screen envy. Platforms like the LISN Kids app offer rich, original audiobooks and audio series for kids from 3 to 12. It’s available on iOS and Android, and turns listening into an immersive, screen-free experience children actually look forward to.

What If You Change Your Mind About Gaming?

Allowing your child to explore gaming doesn’t have to mean opening the door to everything. If you’re considering easing in, do so with intention. Research games with your child. Choose titles that promote creativity, problem-solving, or cooperative play. Resources like this article on video games and attention in elementary school may help inform your decisions.

Set limits that feel sustainable. Create boundaries around when and how games are played — perhaps no gaming before homework, or only on weekends. Discuss expectations openly, and keep the door open to revisiting them if needed.

Build Meaningful Routines Beyond Screens

Even when your child accepts the limits around games, ongoing jealousy may surface. The best antidote isn’t control — it’s connection. Fill their days with things that light them up. It could be family story time, simple baking together, art projects, or going on a walk.

If bedtime is when the gaming envy creeps in — perhaps because that’s when kids compare activities — read this guide on screen-free evening routines for calming bedtime ideas. Or if after school is the hard part, when your child demands screen time just because “everyone else does,” consider suggestions from this helpful article focused on the after-school transition.

Ultimately, your goal isn’t to eliminate their interest in gaming — it’s to empower your child to handle their desires and emotions with confidence. Jealousy is a normal part of growing up. But with your support, your child learns that their worth isn’t tied to what someone else owns — it's in who they are and what they enjoy, with or without a controller in hand.