How to Help Your Child Struggling with Group Work in School
Why group work feels so hard for some children
If you’ve ever watched your child freeze up during a team project or repeatedly come home with tears after group activities at school, you’re not alone. Many children between the ages of 6 and 12—whether shy, highly sensitive, or simply strong-willed—find it deeply uncomfortable to collaborate with peers. For them, group work often feels like a confusing mess of competing voices, unclear rules, and unspoken expectations.
But don't worry: struggling with group work doesn't mean your child lacks social skills or empathy. In fact, some children struggle precisely because they’re too sensitive to group dynamics. Understanding the root of this discomfort is a powerful first step toward helping them feel safer, more confident, and more capable in collaborative situations.
First, observe without fixing
When your child complains about group assignments or seems especially withdrawn after school, your first instinct might be to jump in with solutions or speak to the teacher. But before jumping to action, take a week or two to quietly observe their behavior. What exactly is triggering their distress? Is it specific classmates? The lack of structure? The feeling of not being heard?
Sometimes, simply sitting with your child as they open up about their school day is more valuable than any fix. Validating comments like, “That sounds really frustrating,” or “I can see why you felt left out,” can create a safe emotional space from which actual growth can begin.
Teach the invisible skills of collaboration
Many children who struggle in groups are not being defiant or difficult—they may simply not know what collaboration actually looks like. In school, teachers often expect children to 'work together' without laying out the building blocks for how to do that. Here’s where you can help.
During everyday life, help your child name and practice skills like:
- Taking turns speaking
- Listening even when they disagree
- Offering ideas and staying open to others’ suggestions
- Making a plan as a group
These may sound basic—but they’re hard to master, especially for children who think deeply or get overwhelmed by social pressures. You can find inspiration from family activities that teach cooperation and respect, which make these lessons a natural part of home life, not something that feels like a tutorial.
Use stories to build empathy and social understanding
One powerful way to help children understand group work is through stories. When kids encounter characters who struggle to belong, resolve conflict, or learn to share ideas, they begin to reflect on their own experiences—without the pressure being on them directly.
The iOS or Android LISN Kids App offers original audio series designed for kids aged 3 to 12 that center on emotions, empathy, and teamwork. With immersive storytelling, your child can explore what it means to collaborate and connect—one story at a time.
Stories like these can strengthen social awareness while making shared listening an enjoyable bedtime or weekend ritual for the whole family.
Home as a practice ground for group dynamics
Believe it or not, your home may be the best place to rehearse the challenges of teamwork. Invite cooperation into everyday activities—cooking dinner together, planning weekend outings, or even cleaning up the living room. It doesn’t have to be a lesson. The goal is to make collaboration feel less loaded, more familiar.
When kids know they can disagree respectfully, adapt their ideas, and feel seen during cooperation with parents or siblings, they’re more likely to bring those experiences into peer settings. If you're interested, consider creating social rituals at home that gently introduce structured turn-taking and mutual listening—all fun, all age-appropriate.
Emotional literacy is at the heart of it all
Sometimes, what stops kids from enjoying group work is not the task itself—it’s the swirl of emotions underneath: fear of rejection, frustration from not being listened to, anxiety about making mistakes in front of others. Helping your child name and decode these feelings can be transformative. It gives them language for what's going on inside—a crucial step toward navigating social spaces with confidence.
To go deeper into this subject, explore our reflection on understanding your child’s emotions. The more a child feels in control of their inner world, the better they can relate to what’s happening around them.
Remember: Group work is a long game
No one learns to work in groups overnight. Even many adults struggle in meetings or team projects! The goal here isn’t to make your child 'perfect' at group activities—it’s to help them gradually feel more equipped, more resilient, and more socially aware. Celebrate the small wins: the day they ask another student to join in, the moment they share an idea, the time they handle disagreement without tears.
Stories also provide children with guiding examples that speak to their own social challenges. That’s why exploring how inspiring stories teach empathy and solidarity can be a powerful tool in your parenting toolkit.
And finally, never underestimate how much your quiet support matters. Out there in the overwhelming world of elementary school groups, you are your child’s safe base. From that place of love and steadiness, they will find their own way into connection.