How to Handle Your Child’s Extra Energy Before Bedtime

by LISN Kids | available on iOS & Android

• 3 min read

Understanding the Evening Energy Surge

After a long school day, homework battles, and perhaps even an afternoon of structured activities, it can seem baffling that your child is suddenly bouncing off the walls at 8 p.m. Just when you're hoping to wind down, they ramp up. Sound familiar?

This surge of pre-bedtime energy isn't unusual, especially in children aged 6 to 12. Their bodies and minds are still working through the day’s emotions, experiences, and even leftover stress. Rather than seeing this as a refusal to settle down, view it as unspent energy looking for a safe way to exit.

Why Winding Down Matters

Good sleep doesn’t just begin at lights out. It starts with a gradual decline in stimulation, both physical and mental. Children often need help transitioning from high energy to rest mode. If that transition’s too abrupt—say, zooming from a video game to bed—it can backfire, leaving them lying awake under the covers, overstimulated and frustrated.

A winding-down routine helps teach your child how to move from chaos to calm. It’s a skill, just like tying their shoes or doing multiplication—with time and consistency, they’ll get better at it.

Pre-Bed Energy Isn’t a Problem—it’s Information

When your child seems wild at bedtime, they’re not trying to make things harder. That extra energy is often a signal. Has your child been indoors most of the day? Did they spend their free time on screens? Could anxiety about school be showing up as hyperactivity?

Rather than fighting the energy, think of it as a message. Responding with empathy and curiosity can work wonders. What your child needs may not be more strictness but more release—healthy, gentle ways to move through what’s inside.

Transforming Excess Energy into Calming Connection

You might be tempted to “wear them out” with lots of running or jumping before bed, but overexertion can actually delay sleep. The trick is to channel energy in ways that soothe, not stimulate. Try reframing the last hour before bed as sacred space: a window not for control, but for connection.

Here’s how that might look in real life:

  • Move Together, Quietly: Gentle movement like stretching, yoga, or a slow follow-the-leader game can help your child shift from high gear into low. Try dimming the lights while you do it; soft lighting cues the brain it's time to relax.
  • Let Them Talk: Kids carry a day's worth of emotions in their bodies. Offering space to talk (not interrogate) reliably eases the pressure valve. Even a 10-minute chat during a quiet puzzle or coloring activity can work wonders.
  • Incorporate Familiar Routines: Repetition helps kids feel safe. A consistent sequence—PJs, brushing teeth, cuddles, then a calming story—creates a predictable rhythm their nervous system can match.

Storytime Still Has a Superpower

We often talk about the practical benefits of reading at bedtime: better language skills, more focus, a love for books. But its emotional impact is just as valuable. A calm yet captivating story draws attention inward, quiets mental chatter, and helps the body ease naturally toward sleep.

The soothing power of story is especially helpful for kids who are sensitive, anxious, or imaginative. If reading aloud every night isn’t manageable, that’s okay—there are great audio alternatives that maintain the magic without requiring your constant presence. The iOS and Android versions of the LISN Kids App offer original audiobooks and audio series tailored for ages 3 to 12, making it easier to build a calming routine without more screen time.

LISN Kids App

Audio stories can be seamlessly incorporated into the bedtime ritual—after teeth brushing and hugs, press play, dim the lights, and let the story take over while you quietly step away.

Adapting Routines for Different Temperaments

Some kids crave connection before bed. Others want to retreat into themselves. Your wind-down routine should reflect your child’s unique needs and personality.

If your child needs more help shifting gears, consider these ideas:

  • Use visual schedules—draw the bedtime steps together so your child can follow along independently.
  • Offer a comfort object or weighted blanket to help ground them physically during and after storytime.
  • Create a calm-down space—not a “time out,” but a soft, cozy corner with familiar items where they can slow down if needed.

Patience Pays Off

If you’re struggling through yet another night of chaos before bedtime, it’s okay to feel discouraged. But hang in there. Building a calmer evening rhythm is not about overnight perfection—it’s about showing up consistently, offering safe alternatives to meltdowns or restlessness, and gently teaching your child how to release the day.

As you adjust your bedtime approach, you may also find these articles helpful:

Ultimately, bedtime isn’t just about getting kids to sleep—it’s about helping them feel safe enough to let the day go. And that starts, as it always does in parenting, with presence, patience, and a little creativity.